


day eight: musicals

by Hannah (hannahoftheinternet)



Series: HartmonFest 2019 [8]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Hartmon Fest 2019, Love Confessions, Love/Hate, M/M, Musical References, Musicals, Supervillains
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 07:51:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17935769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannahoftheinternet/pseuds/Hannah
Summary: An evil metahuman whammies Hartley and Cisco. Unfortunately, they can’t lie while under the influence of her powers.





	day eight: musicals

[Standing on opposite ends of the Cortex. As they sing, they move closer to center stage]

 

HARTLEY

_ I hear someone coming… _

 

CISCO

_ I am getting a vibe… _

 

[Facing each other at center stage]

 

BOTH

Oh. It’s you.

 

HARTLEY

You haven’t been singing, have you?

 

CISCO

Have you?

 

HARTLEY

No, I have not. I’m working under the assumption that my power is protecting me.

 

CISCO

Great. I’m so glad you’re immune to this. Now you get to save the day and be an asshole about it.

 

HARTLEY

If you haven’t been singing, you’re probably immune to it too. Do you want to find a way to fix this?

 

CISCO

You don’t have to ask me twice.

 

HARTLEY

What do we know about her?

 

CISCO

Her? Oh, the meta. [A screen displays her information] Facial recognition says she’s Melanie Harper, 24. 

 

HARTLEY

Music teacher at CC Elementary.

 

CISCO

Music teacher, that’s fitting. I’ve only seen her in the traffic cam video from when she fought Barry. Have you seen her in person?

 

HARTLEY

No. Maybe that’s why we’re not affected. We have to be there in person for her to…

 

CISCO

Whammy us?

 

HARTLEY

Don’t say “whammy.” Affect us with her power. But Iris has been at S.T.A.R. Labs this whole time and I just heard her singing a cheesy duet with Barry. Maybe you can catch it and pass it on. Like a game of...

 

CISCO

Operator? Yeah? [off HARTLEY’s look] Okay, it needs some work. 

 

HARTLEY

Did you talk to anyone who’s been singing?

 

CISCO

Talked to Caitlin on my way in.

 

HARTLEY

How did she seem?  _ How has she been? _

 

BOTH

[realizing what HARTLEY just did] Motherf---

 

HARTLEY

_ This can’t happen to me. _

 

CISCO

_ Why? Do you have somewhere to be? Something important to do? _

 

HARTLEY

_ We need to stop Harper. Is that important to you? _

 

CISCO

_ Right. You’re right. Don’t look smug!  _ [he shakes his head, trying to dispel the singing] She makes people sing. It’s a distraction while she robs them.

 

HARTLEY

Look at the video. She has a trigger for her power: a couple lines she sings.  _ I think it’s hypnotic. _

 

CISCO

_ More like chaotic.  _ This is very  _ I’ve Got a Theory _ . [HARTLEY is confused] Haven’t you ever seen  _ Buffy, the Musical _ ? [HARTLEY is really confused] Nah, I bet you don’t even know  _ Rent _ .

 

HARTLEY

_ Rent _ is good. I like  _ Spring Awakening _ . Focus, Cisco!

 

CISCO

Do you have your gloves?

 

HARTLEY

_ Now’s not the time to have a fashion crisis! _

 

CISCO

_ I was thinking more ‘handy sonic devices’. _ Her powers are sound-based. A blast from your gloves might incapacitate her.

 

HARTLEY

_ You beautiful genius. Trust you to think of that. _

 

[he slaps a hand over his mouth, horrified]

 

CISCO

_ Beautiful? Wow, didn’t know you liked me like that. _

 

HARTLEY

Shut up.  _ I can’t lie. I just can’t. I say something but it comes out a different way. _

 

CISCO

_ Think I could have you this way all day? _ That sounded wrong.

 

[the alarm chooses this moment to go off. The screen shows security camera feed, displaying that HARPER is inside S.T.A.R. Labs]

 

HARTLEY

Lucky I figured there would be a fight. [he fishes his gloves out of his bag and puts them on]

 

CISCO

[watching the screen] Why are all the cute metas evil?

 

HARTLEY

Why do you always go for the evil ones?

 

CISCO

Not always. You’re reformed and I’m still going for you.

 

HARTLEY

Excuse me?

 

[HARPER chooses this moment to appear]

 

HARPER

You two aren’t bursting into song yet? I can fix that.  _ Feel free to dance, feel free to sing! Trade some compliments, or maybe a zing. You can find something to reveal, while I look for something to steal. _

 

CISCO

_ What to say, what to say? When I first met you-- _

 

HARTLEY

_ At a loss for words? That’s a first. _

 

CISCO

_ Asshole. _

 

HARTLEY

_ Immature. When I first met you, I thought there had been a mistake. I thought, “There’s no way that this kid is qualified.” _

 

CISCO

_ When I first met you, I thought you were the biggest jerk. I thought, “This guy is the soul of assholeish pride.” And then… You punched me. _

 

HARTLEY

_ You rickrolled me. _

 

BOTH

_ You made my eardrums explode! And all the while, you loved to hate me and it showed. _

 

CISCO

_ From that first moment, _

 

BOTH

_ I knew I would like you. _

 

HARTLEY

_ That somehow, some way, _

 

BOTH

_ Someday, I would like you. _

 

[After thinking the other didn’t like them, it’s a shock. Enough to bring HARTLEY out of the hypnotic trance and realize that HARPER is rifling through different parts of Cortex.]

 

HARTLEY

Sorry in advance. [he slaps CISCO fairly hard]

 

CISCO

Ow! What the hell?

 

[HARTLEY aims a sonic burst at HARPER and she collapses]

 

CISCO

Oh, right. Do… you remember what you were singing?

 

HARTLEY

Do you?

 

CISCO

Yeah. I don’t think I’ll forget that for a while.

 

HARTLEY

Likewise.

 

[HARTLEY pulls CISCO in for a kiss]

 

CISCO

That’s much better than being slapped.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this is a day late! My friend was supposed to beta for me, and by the time she did, my power got knocked out and I was left without WiFi. Kudos to YOU, dear readers, is you got the Rent and Spring Awakening references. I’m proud of parts of this, and not so proud of others.
> 
> Comments are a writier’s best friend!


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